How Not To Ask Me On A Date

So I declined a date request from a guy this weekend and got ragged on from one of my girlfriends for it. She was like, “sweet girl are you nuts that brother is fine with a good job and his own car”. Truth be told those qualities won’t seal the deal for me because I am a career woman with my own vehicle and I know that I am beautifully and wonderful made (S/O to Yahweh for the amazing handy work). What really impresses me is a real gentleman, but sadly it as though the act of shivery is lost these days.  This experience led me to want to post my date request no, no’s.

Here Is How Not To Ask Me Out On A Date.

1.            Do not ask me out via text message, instant message, email, facebook etc. Yes I get it, we live in an age where our smart phones are like a third hand extension but is it not just as easy to use that same phone to dial me up and say, “Hey would like to go out Friday night”.  Even if I do accept your electronic invitation know that you just bought yourself a one way ticket to the Friend Zone because there is nothing romantic about that.

2.            Do not send one of your boys to ask me out on your behalf because that is so high school. A guy with no courage and confidence goes in the REJECTION pile.

3.            Do not say these words, “Would you like to hook up on Friday”. Hook up? When I hear those words, bootie call comes to mind and that my friend is an instant REJECTION.

4.            The consent use of Rasta/Bobo Shanti grammar is a no, no especially when you are not a Bobo or a Rasta. For example “What you saying Empress, truin de I dem been watching your sweetness for a long time still, why don’t you let a serious man like mah self take you out”. For goodness sake use the proper or basic english language please, a lil slang is cool but if that is your entire vocabulary we have a problem REJECTION.

5.            Don’t be a pervert undressing me with your eyes and comment on my body and how sexy you think I am while you’re in the processing of asking me out. It makes me feel cheap and that all you want is a one night stand REJECTION.

6.            Don’t try to trick me into a date by talking about an event and how awesome it would be and when I say, “That sounds fun”. You say, “Cool it’s a date then”.  If you trying to swing me so early in the game I only could image what other tricks you have up your sleeve REJECTION.

7.            Don’t use any cheese cliché line or musical lyrics to ask me out it makes me feel like your fake. I like a guy that can be himself. Simplicity and originality is always the best way to go.

And That’s how Heather Luv See’s It.